Saying Goodbye

I've never been a fan of "goodbyes," and I'm afraid my children have inherited this trait. Cel from a very young age would refuse to tell my parents "goodbye" when it was time for us to leave or for them to go. She just plain wouldn't talk at all, and sometime she would just avoid the situation completely and go about her "business." It appeared sometimes as if she didn't care that they were leaving, which bothered me. However, it became more and more apparent as time went on, and as I watched her during these farewells---she just didn't want them to go so in hopes that they wouldn't go---she WOULDN'T say goodbye. She'd cry terribly after they'd walk out the door or we'd pull out of the driveway. She'd stand at the doorway and watch the taillights on the car, or she'd ask for them after we pulled out of the driveway.

I have to admit in my life...because I've had to say my share of "goodbyes" (both permanent and temporary) that I would like to avoid the situations completely if that were an option. I mean really---denial is sometimes welcome. Why actually SAY it---I don't want to---it doesn't make me feel better---just avoid it. I still cry every time I say goodbye to my Dad. I don't get off the phone with Sam (in most conversations) without saying "I Love You" because I just don't want to get off the phone with him. I'm just not good at the "farewells." They're just plain heart-wrenching. Frankly my heart breaks when I think of others that have to say goodbye to loved ones.

Well, tonight was a "goodbye" night. I DIDN'T say it though. I refuse. Tonight a bunch of us got together to send a friend off. She's had a rough year(but God is good!); her husband is deployed with the Navy...she has three little ones. She sold her house recently, and she will be living with relatives for a few months in another state while she waits for her husband's return (which will move them across the country). My heart aches for her because I know it is difficult...I don't know completely how SHE feels because I'm not her, but I know it hurts. Change often hurts. Leaving the comfort of the known for the uncertainty of the unknown is UNCOMFORTABLE. I'm thankful that she has a Heavenly Father; He knows it all. He knows her thoughts and fears...he knows her needs...even the needs she doesn't know about yet. How COMFORTING is that?! Amazing.

Anyway, one of the worst parts about this goodbye is that this friend and I have not gotten the opportunity to develop our friendship as I think it could have developed. I'm disappointed that now I will miss the "face time." This is not the end of our friendship though. I have said before that many of my friendships (partly due to all those goodbyes) are "long distance" friendships. I have rich friendships with dear sisters in Christ that I haven't seen in years. That's the best thing about friends...especially friends that share your relationship with Christ. You have an eternal bond...you're family. I am reminded of the line from the song that says "friends are friends forever if the Lord's the Lord of them."

Jodi, may God continue to bless and guide your little family as you take this next step. Please know that you are in my thoughts and in my prayers. God has so much for you---of that I am sure!